Twinkling Stars
by CloudTaker
Summary: Prussia is and has always been a girl and really, nothing's changed. Mainly because she doesn't want things to. Fem! Prussia and a few romances for the sake of writing materials


Disclaimer: Do not own Hetalia.

There will be historical discrepancies as it is not written to be historically accurate. Probably Ooc too.

* * *

Prussia had always known she was a girl.

Well, maybe not at first. It was quite confusing really, always feeling disconnected from her fellow personifications (she thought they were simply too un-awesome), and it wasn't until a while later that she finally connected the dots (in her defense, even Grandpa Germania thought she was a boy, and _he_ was the one who she talked to the most, which, admittedly, was not a lot).

But either way, Prussia knew she was female. The only problem was she was too…lazy to tell anyone (her palms were not sweating, she was too awesome for that, thank you very much) and so it was an unintended secret. In fact, only one other being knew.

Gilbird.

The little chick decided to peep (quite literally) on her when she was changing. At first she panicked, almost telling the little bird to not say a word, when she saw how silly she was being. How was _Gilbird_ going to tell? So instead, she sat down, let Gilbird nest in her hair, and told him the whole story.

If one thing in the world was true, then it was the fact that Gilbird was a wonderful listener. He stared unblinkingly down, seeming to soak up every word. If Prussia closed her eyes, she could almost believe that Gilbird actually _understood_ what she was saying. A belief that only grew stronger when Gilbird gave a twittering laugh at her initial freak-out ("Shut UP!").

Still, Prussia left Gilbird with a lighter heart and a smile. Tomorrow, she would tell Germania as well. After all, if the reception was _this_ good, then she wished she had confessed sooner.

So it was the very next day when Prussia went to reveal her revelation to Germania. She was almost there when-

"-useless. Women just don't belong on the battlefield."

Prussia froze.

_What?_

"It is stupidity to even assume they can hold their own. What you are saying is impossible. I will not allow any woman on the battlefield, regardless of who they are."

No...fighting?

Prussia's mind raced. _Nonononono-I want-No- I NEED to be able to fight._

Her breathing quickened.

"Who's there?"

Prussia let out a startled yelp and ran back to her lodgings.

She changed her mind. She had to be able to fight. So she'll prove her worth on the battlefield. _Then_ she'll tell Germania. Yes, that's what she'll do.

Years later, Prussia stood high and accomplished on the defeated remains of her enemy. If anything, this was the opportune moment to reveal her secret. Too bad Germania already faded. But that was okay.

Prussia knew she was a girl. It's just that fighting mattered to her more.

_(Though now, the amount of people knowing has been steadily going up and Prussia finds that she couldn't care less.)_

* * *

Prussia was a fighter. In retrospect, maybe this was why she was attracted to Hungary.

The boy was a fighter as well, and she felt connected to him both physically and mentally. There was just _something_ about him that she seemed to almost be able to connect to herself. Something.

But no matter, because between talking to Hungary and hunting with Hungary, life was great.

Maybe, just maybe, she could tell Hungary her secret.

A quick glance at the boy that she had grown so close to and Prussia made a silent promise to herself.

_Someday. Just not now._

Except that boy was really a girl.

Prussia found out in a way that was completely awkward and un-awesome, and it was a conversation that, though quite funny, she never wanted to repeat again.

But now...

_if Hungary was a girl, then Prussia can trust her._

Then Hungary decided to tell Austria of all people, and, in what seemed like a few seconds but was actually a few months, got married to him.

Prussia could only stare stupefied at the couple.

She had gone to Austria's house (and Lord knows how much she hates that prick) to invite Hungary to go hunting now that everything was settled down. Only to be told that _Hungary didn't do those things anymore._ She was a _lady_.

This was not Hungary. Hungary, who lightened up at the idea of a hunt. Hungary, who loved to spar as much as Prussia.

So who...who was _this?_

Because this was not Hungary, this cannot be Hungary. And if letting people know you're a girl turned a person into..._this_, then Prussia swore she will never, never never **never**, let anyone know.

But at that moment, all Prussia could think about was how Hungary ditched all their years of friendship to be a lady.

A Lady. Complete with a frilly dress and shallow makeup.

A sudden wave of anger and hatred left her seeing red.

How **dare** that..that asshole do this to Hungary. Hungary wasn't a waiting maid. She wasn't. Hungary was a warrior. Nothing could change that-nothing should change that.

The next time Prussia saw Austria, she spat in his face.

_"You **sissy**!"_

_(Later on, Prussia would constantly tease Austria when she saw him. And if she was harsher on him if she met Hungary before him, well, that was his problem. Besides, when Hungary chased after her with fire in her eyes and a frying pan in her hands, Prussia could almost imagine that things were how it should be, and that it was a game of tag in the woods. It was usually because of that that Prussia could never quite keep the grin off her face._

_Not so high and mighty now, are you, Hungary?)_

* * *

Holy Rome was a brat. There is no other way to describe him.

He ate too much, complained too much, snarked too much, and (the worst, in her opinion) liked one of Austria's servant.

And here she thought _Oh , how cute_ when she was handed a baby that was supposed to be her brother.

How not cute.

On the bright side, he was (and Prussia was proud to admit) a good fighter, and _could_ be cute at times...she supposes.

But still, she knew Holy Rome had a high opinion of her (if only for her fighting skills) and so she (very reluctantly) had a high opinion of him.

So it was only natural for her to not want him to find out his mentor was a girl.

Unfortunately the brat was damn perceptive. That and his eyes, which look like they are picking you apart bit by bit.

Prussia, however, was confident in her skills (they were awesome), and kept up the charade for quite a while before she finally slipped up.

She would like to say it was Gilbird's fault. The little bird arrived at just the wrong time, when she was bursting with news to tell him ("And he said, 'You're the crazy one!' while she's like, 'I'll hit you with this pan if you don't shut up!' and it was awesome!"). And whenever she talks to him, she talks about her secret. So it was a slip up. The only problem was that Holy Rome was there. And when she finally realized what happened, she turned to stare at Holy Rome with a horrified shock. He gazed at her with a calculating gaze, her heart pumping twice as fast.

Then, he gave a disappointed sigh.

She flinched.

" Really? That's it?"

" Huh-?"

" I mean, you couldn't have been a secret agent from space or something? How lame."

Prussia's eye twitched and she bristled.

" And after taking forever to find out a secret, it's just that you're a girl. Boring. Now what?"

" Well _excuse_ me if I couldn't-wait what? You mean, you don't mind?"

" As if I care. Just teach me how to fight."

Prussia wasn't quite sure if she wanted to cry in relief or hit Holy Rome over the head. She opted for the latter.

" Brat."

" Ow! Damn woman."

She smiled. Everything was back in order.

_(Prussia didn't cry when Germania died. She didn't cry when Hungary went away. And she most certainly did not cry-she didn't cry, her eyes were just sweating- when Holy Rome woke up and wondered who she was._

_Eyes slightly blurry with what is obviously not tears turn to the sky. "It's just you and me, Gilbird.")_

* * *

Prussia had crushes. It was nothing to be ashamed of, except that her first crush was France. Especially looking at the guy now.

But still, Prussia had liked France for a while, and it started when he too was a crossdresser (he made a really cute girl).

In a way, she connected to him in the same way she connected to Hungary. Both being who they're not. A girl hiding as a boy and a boy posing as a girl. It was this connection that made her like him in the first place.

That and France was so _carefree_. He was a girl because he wanted to be, unlike her, who had to be.

A fact that made her envious, but then hopeful. Maybe she could trust him (like she had once trusted Hungary)? That hope quickly turned to infatuation.

It was almost funny, that she fell in love with a boy that acted exactly like a girl, like the Hungary now. There was something strangely ironic about it. A good kind.

And the best the part was that she didn't change. She didn't get girly and still retained her love for fighting. Even though France began to act manly, Prussia did not become less so. So that made it alright.

So with that dilemma sorted, Prussia talked with France more and tried not to make her crush seem obvious (she probably didn't do that bad a job, seeing as France didn't tease her later on for it)

So she would laugh and clap when France showed off a new dress, and giggle when France fussed over his hair. She looked on even after France decided to grow a beard and become a man. He was actually kind of handsome (though Spain obviously disagreed, always moaning about the world was a lie).

Prussia and France seemed to have grown closer, and she was almost ready to tell him the secret. But looking at the view before her...

The crush on France was abruptly and merciless destroyed in the same manner that France attacked Holy Roman Empire.

Almost familiarily, a sense of rage and anger took over, robbing her of any sense of reason.

With a battle cry, she charged and did everything she could, anything she could, only getting France away from Holy Roman Empire mattering.

France, surprised by the sudden attack, lost his footing and pulled a hasty retreat.

Prussia could care less, would care less. But the brat was not moving and _ohgodwhatwasshegoingtodo?_

She pleaded with her boss ("_Just enough for him to survive, **please**.")_ and managed to rack up enough land for Holy Roman Empire just in time, yet too late.

Because when the kid opened his eyes, his first sentence was _"Who are you?_"

_(Sometimes she wakes up and calls West "brat", and sometimes she looks at France in all his loving glory and wonders at the ache in her heart when this happens. Both are a reminder of Holy Rome, after all)_

* * *

While on the topic of crushes, her second crush was North Italy.

She was dragging aroung Hol-Germany, taking him to every place she knew in hopes that it would trigger some memory. In a desperate, last ditch effort, she took him to Austria's house, where the servant boy/girl was.

It just so happens that it was the servant she was looking for that answered the door, and well, she wasn't impressed.

_This_ was who Holy Rome fell in love with?

The servant (his name was North Italy and he was definitely a boy) was a chatterbox and a coward, and she bet if given the chance, he would mass-produce white flags.

Needless to say, she didn't really like him. However, some kind of recognition was appearing in Holy R-Germany's eyes, and she continued to visit the servant with him.

After a week, Prussia noticed (with much irritation) that North Italy was so..._cheerful_. Unlike with France, this only served to make her hate him more. Like France, she was envious of North Italy (why can _he _help West but she can't?) and this too made her dislike him.

So when the two Germanic nations went to Austria's house, Prussia would walk around or try to torture Austria (she refused to use an un-awesome term like "sulk"). It was during one of these not-sulking times when a bowl of pasta suddenly appeared in front of her.

Prussia spun around, startled, and came face to face with a smiling Italy.

"Ve~ Have some pasta! Pasta is good and cheers everyone up! Have you ever eaten pasta before? It's delicious~"

Yep. Definitely a chatterbox.

But, she thought as she eyed the pasta, at least he's a good cook.

So, eyeing Italy's beaming face, Prussia took a tentative bite.

And it was good, as in really good, and Prussia found North Italy's attitude to be tolerable after a while. Eventually, they talked (well, Italy babbled on about nothing and Prussia gave 'hmm's as replies) and Prussia found it almost refreshing for there to be a lack of silence (Germany didn't talk much. Oh how she missed Holy Rome).

Eventually, as in weeks later, Prussia started to talk back. If she had to guess, it was then that her second crush began.

North Italy was cheery, and suddenly her world seemed much brighter. However, this time, Prussia was unprepared for a crush and began to blush and stammer when around Italy. Germany, who was as perceptive as Holy Rome, noticed this and told her quite firmly that North Italy was _his. _("How possessive" she teased, but pulled back anyway. Anything for her little brother. Though Germany probably forgot about that little conversation, he was only about a few decades old)

_(Besides, she thought, as she watched her little brother and Italy dance around each other, North Italy was never hers to begin with)_

* * *

Prussia loved fighting, not war. Not many people understood the difference. She loved the thrill of attacking and defending, but war, _war_ was brutal and sensless murder. It was a terrible thing. But not many people understood the difference.

So it was no surprise the end of World War Two was also the end of Prussia. Dissolution, she snorts, is a country being wiped out by brats. Since when did paper documents hold so much power anyway? How quaint.

According to America and his little group of "heroes", Prussia was a savage brute that must be put down. Not that she blamed them. She might or might not have manipulated them into putting the blame on her (after all, she's already dead, what's a few more charges?), but that was for her to know and no one to find out. She just hoped the little righteous world council was forgiving.

Otherwise, she just needs to put them on the right track.

"Hitler," she murmured. This was a typical case of power getting to someone's head. It was unfortunate, in this case, that the Allied Powers were pulled into this fight. But she could care less about them. Her people, Germany's people, they were the ones who mattered.

Sometimes, if she closed her eyes, she can hear young and old alike, screaming as they suffocated and their skin was burned. She opened her eyes. _That_ was the true terror of WWII.

How does West feel, she wonders, now that he has finally come back to his senses.

The next few days passed like a blur, and aside from a small heart ache, Prussia was surprising still living. No one understood this phenomenon, but no one questioned it, simply giving her the title East Germany and sent her to live with Russia.

Russia was her third crush, but the first that was not unrequited.

His reaction to her gender was pretty amusing, as it was one of the few things that shocked him.

Well, then. The stars are twinkling tonight, and a midnight snowman sounds like a good idea. ("Come on, Prussia," he laughed. "Play with me, da?)

Perhaps snowmen, then


End file.
